100+ Followers!! 🎊 🎉

Heya guys,

So quick update: I am doing much better in the “friends” situation which some of you know about and I talked about in this post. It’s not that they are much better and I still feel a bit out of place and left out sometimes but I think I have learnt to deal with it better.🙅 Maybe because I realised that some people aren’t going to change and you can’t make them so I just kind of accepted it. It still hurts sometimes but there’s nothing more I can do or want to do.😌 I don’t want to feel so down anymore and I don’t want to waste any more time and emotion on them. And the good news is I have been getting closer to my other friends and it’s going great. 💜 They are super kind and everything you could wish a friend to be. I was hanging out with some of them this weekend and I not only fit right in but also I smiled and laughed like properly for the first time in a long time and it felt great and just invigorating.😂 Although I had a few tests this last week this whole week has just been amazing really. Like I don’t do too badly at school and I feel so much happier. 😄😜gblogggOn top of that, there are now MORE THAN 100 PEOPLE in our little community. YAY!!! This literally makes this one of the best weeks of my life and I am so so happy that you liked my little corner of the internet. And think of this you are part of the reason this is such a great week for me so thank you from the bottom of my heart I really needed some happiness and now I have it and it couldn’t be better. When I started I didn’t expect much I just wanted to share my experiences and have a platform where I can be myself but now it’s so much more than that. It is our little internet family and you guys are so incredibly supportive and kind. I still can’t quite believe it. Like Whaaaaat! 💭I mean just wow and thank you!!

Love you all!! ❤ You are the best honestly!

 

Going offline,

Girlalert xxx

girlalert.here@yahoo.com

Finding a lost voice

Heya guys,

Before you start reading the post I just wanted to explain why I didn’t post on Friday. Firstly I will probably only be posting once a week and that will probably be Friday or Monday but since I had already posted that week I didn’t post on Friday. Hope you don’t mind. Now this topic is kinda dark I guess but we need to embrace the light and the dark because are in us whether we admit it or not. It’s like those little cartoons where the person would have an angel on one shoulder telling it to do good and then the devil on the other shoulder telling us that we can be naughty and bad. Sometimes I can’t help myself and I am tempted or convinced by my own demon or devil I guess and I believe the lies he feeds me through my ear but then later I regret it or feel even more horrible. So this is kinda one of these things I guess.


Image result for finding my own voiceBelieve it or not, I am an extremely loud, extroverted person on the outside but inside I am an insecure mess at times and maybe even a bit anxious around people. Oh and let’s not forget totally self-conscious. Now some of you who have read my other posts might know I have struggled in the past with completely opening myself up and not hiding behind a facade for fear of being judged for being weak or a downer. But I am working on breaking down my mask/facade and every day I am a little closer but I think I will always have my down days at times and I think it’s normal and human and people need to accept that and stop judging people for it. But one of the things that I kept up as a facade was generally going along with everything someone else would say. For example, if my friend likes a certain movie and I didn’t I would sometimes pretend I did because I wanted to fit in I didn’t want to have a disagreement or even disagree with her because she might like me a little less for it or maybe judge me for it. So many little things like that added up to make the facade and mask I, kind of, live with now. I always agreed with everyone and never voiced my own opinion even if it differed. I was the girl who could fit in and blend anywhere but not because of who I am but because of who I became. The anxiety of being judged or deserted for being different consumed it and made me a different person to the point where I almost didn’t recognise me. I know it may seem a bit melodramatic to you but it’s the truth and reality for me. I hid my feelings and emotions and opinions just everything really.

And I knew I was living with a mask. I knew subconsciously that this wasn’t me but I guess I didn’t want to admit it because once I do I will have to change. And I don’t know how I didn’t realise this earlier but only a few days ago I realised I didn’t even have a voice, an opinion of my own, not really anyway. The way I realised it was that in my friendship situation which you might know f you read a group but not really, one of my older posts, has caused me to feel quite left out and lonely. Basically to summarise the situation: I am in a trio of friends and it kinda went all great until a few months ago when suddenly the two other friends in my trio started to hang out a lot more and without me. I am not just saying outside of school but even in school. Like even if we had to work as partners we would convince the teachers to let us work as a three. And previously we would save seats for each other in class and talk about everything. But now the other two always work in a pair and not save seats for each other but not me and I kind of feel excluded and the thing is I didn’t do anything to upset them because when I ask them about this they claim nothing has changed and we are all just as close and at first I believed it because we that’s what I always did right agree with others. But then it started to grow and I felt more and more alone and left out so I knew that it wasn’t just me being paranoid of losing a friendship so valuable to me I knew that even if they weren’t doing it on purpose it was definitely there. And this feeling just grew and grew and I kind of snapped out of it in a way a few days ago when it just became so much for me and I admitted to myself that, you know what, despite what they say it’s there and what I am feeling is not just my imagination. I have been caused to feel it even if they disagree with it. Because I do have a voice after all. I feel differently and you know what? It’s okay. I don’t have to agree with everything they say because otherwise I am not myself and they aren’t friends with the real me. They like the mask I put on. I don’t mean just the two others in my trio because I have opened up to them about how I wear a mask figuratively and they know the real me or so I think but my others friends might be friends with the masked girl, not the real me. So I decided that I had to change. I had to own and respect my own voice. If I have a different opinion to someone else then so what? Was this change going to be scary? Heck YES. Even today I started my other friends were saying how they don’t like a certain subject and previously I had always been silent and had no opinion sometimes even agreed with them but this time I stood up for myself because if I don’t look out for myself who will? I disagreed with them and they were shocked. They looked perplexed that I dare have a different opinion. Haha. I just explained that the same way they had their opinion I do too and if mine was different so what? We should all be allowed to have our own view on things and it doesn’t mean we can’t be friends it just means that we disagree on one tiny thing out of many many other things we agree on. It may seem insignificant to you guys but for me it was a huge step towards finding my own voice again and being confident. A step towards breaking down my mask and showing the world the real me. Yeah, it was scary but hey I think it will be worth it! So I have decided to not be silent anymore. I will stand by my voice and won’t let anyone take it away from me ever again. It’s the essence of my personality. It’s my voice and I want it back!


So I get that this is a dark and controversial issue but this is my take on it. I won’t listen to the little devil on my shoulder telling me to compromise and fit in. I will listen to the angel telling me to not hide but voice my opinions. What about you guys? What do you think of this? Love you all and hope you guys had a good start to the week!

 

Going offline,

Girlalert xxx

girlalert.here@yahoo.com

Starting new

I am back. It’s me again: Girlalert here to give u another piece of advice and a word of motivation. Okay okay I’ll stop, can I possibly get any cheesier?! That was totally lame. Anyway….

Howdy everyone,

How u doin’? How’s school? Yes I did just say school, sorry to bring it up but my topic today is kinda linked to that. I hope u guys had an amazing summer, getting your tan on and relaxing in the sun by a beautiful beach or not doing that but something just as good. 😉

Starting new can sometimes be for the better or for the worse. But starting new will always be a second chance in life at something you can perfect. Okay okay I know that starting new can also be very nerve racking and you might get very nervous because you have a new environment now and don’t know it as well … if u no what I am trying to say 🙂 I would no because like I mentioned in the last post I am now starting Year 9 well actually it already kinda started a few days ago but anywho… starting year 9 was a second chance in school. For example if u messed up and really weren’t very great at school or mean to kids in the lower school, life gives u another chance to change for the better and be different in Year 9 by approaching it in another way. Starting new also means that you should be open to new things and new people, like in my case. Right now I am getting to know some amazing people because they joined after passing 13+ and if i hadn’t been open to them I would have never gotten to know them and that would have seriously been a shame. you also start new in the sense that your classes get completely reshuffled and you don’t have the same environment, the same people but you learn to branch out and that is one of the most important skills to learn.

Sowwy if this post was a bit confusing it’s a bit hard to describe but let me try in a summary version:

Starting new is another chance at life, when u can try to change, try something different, be different and change for the better. Starting new doesn’t mean you messed up before it simply means that you get a chance to experience something out of your comfort zone, something maybe a bit more challenging, something different,you experience dissimilar situations and how to behave in them. You learn to branch out and get to develop a whole set of new skills.

Going offline,

Girlalert xxx

Show offs-nobody likes them

Hey everyone,

Firstly I am so sorry I couldn’t write for ages. It is just that school started again, all the stress, homework, classwork and tests come with it. Imagine it wrapped up in a package and you can’t just have the things you like but have got to take everything with it or nothing at all. In this case not going to school, which I wouldn’t advise. Schoolwork is already so much but then having to watch people showing-off can be really annoying and provocative, right? /:) Don’t tell me you don’t know what I mean because there is always some in every school, even if you are one there are others. What I came to say is that if you feel low because everybody is showing-off but you feel like you don’t have any potential in anything and have nothing to show-off with, then just stop it. Stop making yourself feel even smaller, by thinking about it. I know this probably sounds so stupid to all of you right now, but think about it. After a while you will understand, I promise you. Don’t think that you aren’t good enough because you are, your strength just lies in something else and you just haven’t realized it yet or it you just haven’t tried out something yet. Your strength might even lie in blogging 😛  You get it? 😉 Okay you probably don’t cause I have very strange humor. Yes, I know! Well, back to the topic….. If you need help trying to find out what you might be able to not show-off in but feel as if you are the best in it, then you know my e-mail. Feel free to send me e-mail. Remember I opened and created that e-mail so you guys and send me your comments and questions without others seeing them.

AND REMEMBER EVERYBODY IS SPECIAL IN THEIR OWN WAY, SO DON’T FEEL LOW BECAUSE OF SHOW-OFFS that is the main message to take from this post. Wow it is not even that late and I am already dead tired, sorry gotta go and sleep or I won’t be able to get up tomorrow. *(:| yawn

Oh how I love emojis.

Going offline,

Girlalert xxx

girlalert.here@yahoo.com

PS: Sweet dreams

Never give up!!

You know this feeling when you tried so hard and you still didn’t achieve anything? You feel exhausted, disappointed and you just want to give up? Even the tiniest bit of hope and positivity is gone. Well, believe it or not at that moment you can forget that many people feel like that and you aren’t the only one. What I am trying to say is : NEVER GIVE UP!!!! It probably sounds very foolish and dumb cause you might think that everyone knows that, but you forget that at the moment. It is important to never give up and always remember that because if you give up you are never gonna reach your goal but if you keep trying there’s a possibility that you might achieve what you wanted. I am just a girl whose in secondary school and it took me quite a while to really understand how important it is to never give up. When I was small I just thought that it was just one of the many sentences that my parents said were important. But growing up and getting to know the truth behind life I understood that this sentence Is more than just 3 words. It is vital to know that. Always get back up and fight!! So do me a favor and take a minute to think about what these 3 little words really mean to you.

Going offline,

Girlalert xxx

never-give-up-11-5

Facing your fears!!!

Hi everyone,

I read this amazing book by Zoella called “Girl online” and it inspired me to write about facing your fears as well. Almost everyone is afraid of something and the purpose of this blog is to talk about them, because I’m sure you’re not the only one feeling this way.

I have a big phobia of spiders and snakes and a few days ago, I had to go into our old shed, full of spiders and spider-webs. It was scary 😦 In other words I had to face my fear. Sometimes facing your fears won’t change the fact that you are scared of it but it can definitely make you feel a bit stronger. So, definitely try it and comment on how you did 😉 Hope this post inspired you to do that.

Going offline,

Girlalert xxx